Pushing Me Away
by Chikage Yuishii
Summary: "Meeting you was fate, being friend was a choice but falling in love is way beyond my control" This is my first song fic by Linkin Park. Rated for Shounen-ai, blood and suicide. Pair: ?/Ray/?


Disclaimer: I do not own any Beyblade character or this song. This song belongs to Linkin Park.

  
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I've lied to you  
  
The same way that I always do  
  
This is the last smile  
  
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you   
  


  
I sat there, staring silently at your picture. Wonder, if you'll ever miss me when I'm gone? Of course not, I thought bitterly.

  
~Flashback~

  
"What are you doing up so late?" He asked in concern seeing me in a middle of night. "Nothing." I lied as usual, faking a smile at him. Of course, he grinned back in relief.

  
~End of flashback~

Why can't you ever see the truth through the lie in my eye? I wanted to scream at you, but in the end all I did was fake a smile. There's no use saying anything now, not when you are with him already.  
  


I hate you, Ray. If it hadn't been for you, I would've already confessed my feeling.  
  


~Flashback~

Uh. I-uh." I stammered not knowing how to word the sentence. "Hey." Ray interrupted the conversation just in time. "Aren't we supposed to be training today?" He avoided my glare.  
  
"Oh ya, you want to come?" You turned to me, forgetting everything I was trying to tell you. I sighed and replied no. "Ok then, see ya later." You waved and walked away with him.  
  


~End of flashback~  
  


Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down  
  
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie  
  
Everything has to end, you'll soon find we're out of time left to watch it all unwind  
  
The sacrifice is never knowing  
  


In the flesh, I tried to tell you. But he's always with you wherever you go. If only killing people wouldn't be considered a crime, I would've indeed ripped his throat out.  
  


Each morning, he would deliver a kiss or hug to you. Everyone starts to tease you, while I've tried so hard each time not to shed any tears or break you two apart. It hurt so much, you'll never understand.  
  


Why I never walked away  
  
Why I played myself this way  
  
Now I see your testing me pushes me away  
  


 Sometimes, I want to walk away and wish I'd never see you again. But each time you're gone, I miss you the most. Why does everything have to be this way? Or haven't I suffered enough already.  
  


I've tried like you  
  
To do everything you wanted too  
  
This is the last time  
  
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you  
  


  
  


As if eternity has passed by, I finally stood up. The smoke started up as I burned the picture into a puddle of ash. The smell of burned crisp choked me.  
  


Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down  
  
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie  
  
Everything has to end, you'll soon find we're out of time left to watch it all unwind  
  
The sacrifice is never knowing

  
Why I never walked away  
  
Why I played myself this way  
  
Now I see your testing me pushes me away  
  


'Someday, you'll regret having to treasure this knife.' I thought as a cold smirk appeared on my face. Holding it carefully, I sliced it down my wrist. Cutting the edge of my hand as blood dripped onto the floor.  
  


We're all out of time, this is how we find how it all unwinds  
  
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie  
  
We're all out of time, this is how we find how it all unwinds  
  
The sacrifice is never knowing

  
Why I never walked away  
  
Why I played myself this way  
  
Now I see your testing me pushes me away  
  


I cut my wrist deeper and deeper until more blood starts to stream down just like those tear in the past. There's no pain that I'm feeling for that you've used up all my emotion. I kneel down on the carpet and heard the sound of the dropping blade.  
  


Pushes me away.  
  
Pushes me away.  
  
Pushes me away. 

Dear Tyson,  
  
Meeting you was fate, becoming friends was my choice, but falling in love with you was way beyond my control. /b  
  


Using my finger, I dipped the blood on my own hand and wrote this note. "Goodbye, Tyson." I whispered toward the air before darkness covered me and fell into deep unconsciousness.  
  


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Author's note: This is my first song fic. Hope you enjoyed it. Do you think that I should write another chapter to see Tyson's reaction and reveal who fell for him? Please R+R!


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